Archives for June 2016

Two Good Ideas

June 29, 2016 By dnicewonger@gmail.com 1 Comment

porch june29 It is Wednesday afternoon.

I am sitting on my porch enjoying a gentle breeze as the day turns into evening.

I have given my daughter the “privilege” of using the family vehicle to go to the grocery store and pick up a few things for dinner. I love this short season in a new driver’s life when their new found sense of freedom out ways any sense of obligation or chore. I remember it in my own life. I was willing to run and pick up my brothers at school or church events. We needed a gallon of milk…toss me the keys and I was your man. I will admit it is kind of hard not to feel like I am “taking advantage” of the desire for freedom…but hey, she has to learn sometime. She just pulled back into the driveway. I can feel my blood pressure dropping…now I can relax a little more and talk of other things.

I went to the gym today. I met with Kristi, one of the trainers, to talk about how I can exercise and what would be good for me. To be honest I am growing tired of what I am calling the “old mans shuffle”. I have never been a great athlete…but I have at least been in decent shape. These days my joints ache and I find I move at the lightning speed of a sloth. Standing up takes effort. There are times I am not stable and especially in crowds I find I am less than steady on my feet. The other day I was helping my brother, Nancy and Rayann do some work around the home and ended up flat on my back. We were clearing out a section of the yard/forest/overgrown mess. I was mainly supervising. I was told that was my job. I did it pretty well until there was this mess of vines that “just needed to come down”. They were growing up into the trees and were going to kill everything if we did not take care of them. When nobody was looking (okay, with everyone watching) I moved over and started to pull them out of the trees. One by one I was winning and accomplishing something. Yeah for me. I grabbed hold of the next vine. It could not have been any bigger round than my pinky finger. I tugged and pulled and yanked but there was no movement. Finally I gave one last pull with all I could muster. The vine snapped and I ended up on my back. There was total silence. Nobody said a word. Nancy did not laugh, which is her default reaction when someone does something to hurt themselves. I slowly picked myself up off the ground and said, “I think I will go over here to sit down, hydrate myself and supervise for a while.” Nobody argued and they slowly went back to work after I sat down. My time at the gym this morning was good. Kristi was great. We talked over options and I will be going back so she can help move me in the right direction. I am hoping it helps give me stamina, stability and simply puts my mind on things other than fighting Cancer. [Read more…]

THERAPY

June 25, 2016 By dnicewonger@gmail.com Leave a Comment

We all have those things that help clear our minds and provide a sense of peace to life.

For me it is my wood shop. I love to get in the shop and make some sawdust while creating something. My shop is partially set up…there is lots more to be done but at least I can get to my tools when I need them.

For Nancy her “therapy” comes by way of flowers. If she can get out into a flower bed and pull a few weeds life seems to get just a little bit better. The flower bed in front of the house was an overrun mess when we moved in. Our master plan was to get out and address the landscaping issues around the house as soon as it got warm out. With my Cancer diagnosis things got put on hold and we figured we would get to things next year.

A few weeks later Nancy was really missing the therapy that “playing in the dirt” provided her. She shared, “I have no place to plant even a few flowers. We decided we would tackle the front garden so she would have a place to “play”. After a little work, building a new wall and spreading some mulch we have a nice new garden area for Nancy to get some “therapy.”

I wish I had taken some before pictures. I cannot wait until what is growing has a chance to take root and really grow.

Deep 2 Deep

June 25, 2016 By dnicewonger@gmail.com Leave a Comment

117655 Many people will confess they have a favorite Psalm. A piece of scripture that seems to capture their heart and speak for them when the words simply do not come. The truth is that we may have many “favorites” as God uses a different piece of His word to meet us in different seasons of our lives.

Psalm 42 has been one of those special pieces of scripture for me. It is one many of us are familiar with, at least the first few verses. There was a season when “As the Deer” was a very popular praise and worship song. It was sung in many a church, small group, youth group and people loved the uplifting and hopeful words it offered. It is not unusual to find a nice peaceful picture of a deer standing in a beautiful green field beside a slowly flowing stream with the first few words from the Psalm somewhere on the picture.

These are nice, peaceful, comforting images and yet they betray the heart of the Psalmist. Take a moment and read all of Psalm 42. Listen to the Psalmist’s heart, hear their cry as they pour out their soul to God.

As the deer pants for streams of water,
so my soul pants for you, my God.
My soul thirsts for God, for the living God.
When can I go and meet with God?
My tears have been my food
day and night,
while people say to me all day long,
“Where is your God?”
These things I remember
as I pour out my soul:
how I used to go to the house of God
under the protection of the Mighty One
with shouts of joy and praise
among the festive throng.

Why, my soul, are you downcast?
Why so disturbed within me?
Put your hope in God,
for I will yet praise him,
my Savior and my God.

My soul is downcast within me;
therefore I will remember you
from the land of the Jordan,
the heights of Hermon—from Mount Mizar.
Deep calls to deep
in the roar of your waterfalls;
all your waves and breakers
have swept over me.

By day the Lord directs his love,
at night his song is with me—
a prayer to the God of my life.

I say to God my Rock,
“Why have you forgotten me?
Why must I go about mourning,
oppressed by the enemy?”
My bones suffer mortal agony
as my foes taunt me,
saying to me all day long,
“Where is your God?”

Why, my soul, are you downcast?
Why so disturbed within me?
Put your hope in God,
for I will yet praise him,
my Savior and my God.

“My tears have been my food, day and night” “I pour out my soul” “Why must I go about mourning?” It is not all beautiful deer and gentle streams flowing through lush green valleys. The Psalmist captures the reality of walking with Jesus in the midst of a world that is filled with pain, hurt and turmoil. They let us know that it is not all roses and easy…and yet, “Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.”

I have been drawn to this Psalm for years. There is a sense of honesty and reality about it that I love. In the middle of the Psalm there are four words which have captivated my spirit, “Deep calls to Deep”. As I read those words one day it struck me that what the Psalmist was talking about was the Depth of God calling out to the depth of individual people…just as the depth of people call out to the Depth of God. “Deep calls to Deep”. The more I thought about it and meditated on it the more I “fell in love” with those words. The deep parts of who I am, my inner soul crying out to God and the God of grace, power and mercy speaking back to me. A relationship. A conversation. An opportunity to share the inner most parts of who I am with my creator (not that he did not know them already) and for me to hear from Him how He saw me, and to seek to understand His plans for my life. “Deep calls to Deep”. In the midst of the struggle I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God because he hears the cry from the depth of my soul and shares with me the depth of His heart. [Read more…]

Titanic

June 24, 2016 By dnicewonger@gmail.com Leave a Comment

Aaron, myself, Owen after the show Thursday night

Today was a good day.

Had an early morning doctor appointment to get a shot to help build up my white blood cell count.

Spent some time with a great group who are seeking what it means to be still and listen for the “still small voice of God”.

Had time for a nap.

Then I got to spend the evening with Aaron, Owen, and Patrick Fresolone at the Delaware All State Theater. All three were part of the production of Titanic.

Patrick worked the scenery backstage, which was amazing. Owen played three different characters. Aaron did a fantastic job with some special musical numbers. It was a great show! Nancy, Rayann and I enjoyed the evening.

They have three more shows…I would encourage you to go and check one of them out if you have time.

Friday, June 24th 7:30 pm

Saturday, June 25th 7:30 pm

Sunday, June 26th 2:00 pm

For More Information

To Order Tickets

CHEMO ROUND 4

June 21, 2016 By dnicewonger@gmail.com 1 Comment

A gift from Mission Center New Jerusalem in Springfield, MA

Monday was the fourth round of chemotherapy. My oncologist made some changes in the way it was administered and I got an extra amount of fluids as part of the treatment. Monday night was the best first night after chemo that I have had so far. I was able to eat. I did not get any fever or chills and my temperature stayed down within the normal range all night. I was able to sleep and woke up on Tuesday feeling the best I have felt coming off of a chemo treatment. I continue to be thrilled with the way my oncologist and his team are working to make this season as easy and manageable as possible. The nurses who give the treatments are amazing and are really doing all they can to help ensure I go through this as easy as possible.

Tuesday was an okay day. I was very weak. I made it into the office for the morning. I spent time cleaning up my office, things have gotten cluttered over the past few weeks. I had a visit from Rev. Kevin Walden from ABCOPAD. It was a good time of sharing and prayer. Nancy and I had an appointment at 2pm and then I was home taking a nap and working to stay hydrated. [Read more…]

ASSISTANCE

June 17, 2016 By dnicewonger@gmail.com 2 Comments

Today was an unusual day.

I did not feel great all day. I spent some time in the office. Very productive time, but felt as if I was under some kind of a cloud all the time. I was moving slow and my joints all hurt as I moved.

At 11am Rayann and I went and picked up food for the JAM Daycare celebration lunch. The staff has done a great job these past months and we recently moved to STAR 3 in the Keystone Stars program. It was fun to take time to celebrate all their hard work.

In the afternoon I went home to take a nap. Rayann and Nancy went off to the DMV so Rayann could take her drivers test. A few hours later I got a phone call that started, “hey Dad, you are talking to a licensed driver!” She passed on her first try and nailed the parallel parking piece. I guess the small bump on my truck as she was practicing was worth her passing. 🙂

After my nap I enjoyed the FBC softball game. It was a great game. Our team was on it tonight and I had fun talking with those gathered to watch.

Following the game I thought I would take a quick trip to Lowes to pick up a few bags of topsoil and mulch for a small piece of our front yard. Nancy loves gardening and her flowers. Spending time in the garden is a kind of therapy for her and it helps relieve stress. We had great landscaping plans for our new home but we have put them on hold until I am feeling better. Finishing this small piece will give Nancy a place to plant some flowers and spend time in the garden when she needs a break from life. I managed to load the bags of soil and mulch onto a cart and wheel them to the front for checkout. As I made my way to the front of the store it was clear I did not have the strength I used to. [Read more…]

TRANSFORMATIONS

June 15, 2016 By dnicewonger@gmail.com Leave a Comment

I love my oncologist and the nurses and staff who are taking care of me. I awoke today and it was clear that I was feeling the effects of pushing a little too hard on Monday. I had not kept hydrated and my body was telling me things were not right. I went to church, completed a few small projects, had a great lunch with a good friend and then made a call to the doctors. They took me right in, gave me a bag of fluids and all of a sudden I was feeling a whole lot better. Making sure I stay hydrated is one big piece of my “new normal”. I always thought I did a good job at that…apparently not as good as I thought. One of the “transformations” over the past few weeks is that I have swapped my Dunkin Donuts cup for a water bottle.

Life will never be the same after hearing the words, “you have Cancer”. I am thankful for the “transformations” that have come along on this journey which are life giving and life affirming. Cancer has helped me slow down, celebrate what truly matters and not get distracted by “secondary things”. When I was first in the hospital I turned off the sound on my phone and would periodically check for messages and emails. As I left the hospital I was not ready to have the phone control my life as it had earlier…so the ringer stayed off. Over a month later and the ringer is still off. I do not get a notice with every text, email or Facebook update. People call, they leave a message, I call them back…it works wonderfully and I am not a “slave” to the beeps and rings of my phone. I am present for the conversation around the table, across the room or on the street. A simple change that has “transformed” the way I am in relationship with people I am present with. [Read more…]