Asking for help is never easy. Caregiver lesson; the caregiver is often the one who needs help. I can be more clear when the ask is for ME.
In my role as a caregiver, there are times when I need to request help from others.
As the person with cancer, Dan often feels that a request for help is because he is weak and unable to complete a task.
When we were moving pieces of trees that had been cut down, he refused to have me ask someone for help because he was able to cut the tree into sections himself. What he didn’t think about, was that moving the section of the tree out of the woods (my job) was difficult for me.
I was wanting to ask for help for ME, not for him. This is a time when clear communication could override feelings of weakness and the desire to overcome physical challenges.
NOTE: I (Dan) help Nancy with the editing and such with her caregiver journals. As I listened to this one I was reminded of something I wrote about our woodpile.
Where Nancy was looking for help...I was focused on filling the wood rack. All a matter of perspective. Kind of crazy how we can walk a journey so closely with someone and have a very different perspective.
There is a lesson in there somewhere…