Spiritual Formation Catalyst
Working to help people respond to the Spirit's call in the midst
of their everyday lives so that they may experience what Jesus describes as,
"life to the full."
Nancy’s Caregiver Journal
During a recent trip to learn about a liver transplant for Dan, I found myself exhausted.
I had not done anything.
How could I be so tired?
Sometimes the emotional drain of information overload is a reality I have to recognize.
Misplaced emotions can be strange things. My emotional reaction to a “bad” apple pie revealed I was wrestling with deeper things.
It happened again the other day. McDonald’s got me.
The fact that this has happened more than once should probably embarrass me. But, instead, it got me thinking.
Nancy and I were traveling back from Rochester, and we stopped at McDonald’s to use the restroom and a quick bite to eat. As I was finishing up my meal, I felt myself longing for something more. I was craving an apple pie.
Nancy went up to the counter and ordered two apple pies. The anticipation was almost too much. I could not wait to open up that small rectangular box and slide out the gift of apple goodness.
I was polishing off the last of my fries as Nancy returned. The timing was perfect.
Opening the pie, my heart sank. Oh yeah, they started baking their pies.
What I longed for was the apple pie of my youth. The deep-fried, so hot it would blister your mouth apple pie. You could hear the crust crunch as you ate it. Never mind the fact that your arteries were clogging with each bite. A fried apple pie from McDonald’s was living!
Sitting there looking at this baked pile of mush, I was crushed. Disappointment rolled over me. I actually heard myself say, “it’s only an apple pie.” [Read more…]
Caring for another person often means putting the needs of that person before my own. And sometimes it means being creative. Thus a lesson about a donut.
To see all of Nancy’s Caregiver Journals visit the Caregiver Journal Archives.
I stepped off the bus at Pieter B. Coeymans Elementary on my way into school. As I walked alongside the bus, someone still on the bus started shouting less than kind words at me. Fixing my eyes on them, I gave them the fiercest look I could muster and then walked right into a brick column. (You are free to laugh.)
The morning I face-planted into that brick column, I was eight or nine years old. This year I will turn 54. Any physical pain has long since gone away. Yet this is one of my most vivid memories from those elementary school years. Something about being made fun of, trying to be tough, and then walking into the column, well, it did not measure up with my image of what I should be.
One of life’s biggest fears is that people will discover how little we have our lives figured out and put together. So we often make decisions or say things all to protect people from discovering the “truth we know about ourselves.” We put on mask after mask, so people do not see our struggles. Our biggest fear is that if they knew, truly knew who I am, what I am dealing with, they might not like what they see.
If we are not careful, people might realize we are seconds away from walking into a brick column. [Read more…]
Nancy’s Caregiver JournalBeing a caregiver is not always about the big circumstances of life but around issues like transportation. Dan was in the hospital in Philadelphia which is an hour away from our home. My car was scheduled to go into the garage because it had been leaking transmission fluid. Plan B involved driving Dan’s truck back and forth to the hospital. And therein was the new lesson I learned.
You can view all Nancy’s videos by visiting the playlist, Nancy’s Caregiver Journal.
Nancy’s Caregiver JournalPeople often tell me I am “strong” because of the way I journey with Dan through his illness. I struggle with that term because I understand the ups and downs of this journey. During a time when Dan was in the hospital, I watched myself stay “strong” during some circumstances and then fall apart during others. I like to say that I am strong but struggling.
You can view all Nancy’s videos by visiting the playlist, Nancy’s Caregiver Journal.
One of the first things I learned as a caregiver, was how much I did not know.
Daniel has been a seeker his entire life, seeking a deeper relationship with Abba Father. He has served as pastor for American Baptist churches in New York, Massachusetts, and Pennsylvania. His passion is to "help people encounter God in the midst of their everyday lives." He writes with a transparency intended to allow others to see the struggles that lead to healing and life. Daniel currently serves as Spiritual Formation Catalyst for A Place in the Conversation.
Daniel's journey was disrupted when the doctor said, "You have stage IV colon cancer." Questions of "Why" and "If only" crowded his mind. Can one encounter God in the midst of a cancer journey? Join this seeker as he shares the pain and joys of this journey not of his choosing. Daniel's wife, Nancy, joins in sharing some of her thoughts, and feelings as she watches her husband fight his battle.